Monday, September 14, 2009

Anger V Happiness

"Anger - an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured." - Seneca

I don't have an explosive temper, nor do I spend long periods of time being shitty, but like all people, I do get angry. Being angry is something which will always happen and to learn to control it and get over whatever it is you're angry about is a battle. I suppose you could call this article a continuation of my post - Learning (I suspect there will be many posts on the subject of learning). There are so many sources of anger, so obviously I'm only going to talk about some of them and how I'm learning to react to that anger.

Having a difference of opinion with someone can lead to anger and an argument if you let it (this generally happens with those closest to us, with others we often keep our mouths shut). To argue with someone and to continue an argument with someone, even after both parties have gotten their points across is really just an attempt at domination. Both people want to be right, to have the other person know that they're right. I've argued with Brooke before and thought to myself after a couple of minutes of angry silence that I want so badly to not be angry, but this desire in me to have her agree with me and win this argument is so strong. I've only recently acknowledged anger and the resulting arguments for what they are, and realised that its not worth being angry at someone you love, or anyone for that matter, in order to win and argument (which is joke in itself because you can never 'win' an angry argument).

Money is a major source of worry and anger. Whether we have too much or not enough most people are never really satisfied. When I pay too much for something I generally feel angry about it, I feel as though I've been ripped off - really I feel like a fool. No one likes to be made to feel or look foolish. The thing about money is that it cannot make you happy and it should not make you angry. If you spend too much money one week, or you've paid too much for something, try to think - in a couple of weeks time, I will have been paid again, will I actually care about that money I spent? Will I even still remember? Probably not. Perhaps that’s too simplistic, I don’t think it is because it seems to works for me. Being angry really is silly because what you're angry about has occured. The time has passed, you cannot do anything about it, if you could you wouldn't be angry.

In the end, all anger does is delay your happiness. It's fine to get angry at things, but to be able to realise and accept that the world isn't perfect and that not everything will go how you'd like is key.

- Dogman


  1. This is too true. Yet the hardest thing to do is to take a moment when you are angry and be objective about it. It feels like every part of you is craving some sort of redemption even though you know it won't come. I feel I am getting better at it though

  2. And you haven't read or learnt about buddhism?? That's a great discovery. I had this understanding too when I was in new York as I was Robert thurman's book. We think we will find an answer in our wollowing but we are just getting further away from it. Forgiveness is so important, whether it be to yourself or the other person. Now if I could stop throwing controllers at Eden. There's such a selfishness that's involved in anger. It's good us learning this now instead of some midlife crisis.

  3. Hamish you need to focus on the anger, how will you ever learn the ways of the dark side?